11. How Positive Emotions Create an Upward Spiral

Episode 11: How Positive Emotions Create an Upward Spiral

Welcome to the blog version of the Redefining Happiness Podcast. If you've been enjoying the series on positive emotions, today's post continues that journey by exploring how even small, uplifting moments can start something scientists call an upward spiral. We'll also talk about a concept called the 3-to-1 positivity ratio and how you can apply it to your own life.

What Is an Upward Spiral?

You’ve probably heard the term “downward spiral” before, where one bad thing leads to another, and another.

In psychology, especially in the study of depression, downward spirals are where negative emotions and moods narrow your thinking, making things feel worse, which pulls you even deeper into negativity, creating a negative cycle of worsening depression.

But positive emotions can set off the opposite effect.

An upward spiral is a kind of positivity feedback loop, and it works like this:

• You feel a positive emotion, maybe it’s gratitude, curiosity, or joy.
• That feeling helps you think more clearly, see more possibilities, or handle something with a little bit more patience.
• Because you handled that moment well, you feel even better, leading to more positive emotion.

One moment builds on the next, and that’s how the upward spiral gains momentum.

Over time, this cycle helps build emotional strength. You start growing your personal resources, things like optimism, emotional intelligence, creative problem-solving, and stronger relationships. And as those things grow, it becomes even easier to experience positive emotions and keep the spiral going.

And then you’re not just getting through life anymore, you’re spiraling upward.

What the Research Shows

We know that positive emotions can create upward spirals, but what happens when those upward spirals build over years?

One study looked at 180 Catholic nuns who had written autobiographies in their early twenties. Decades later, researchers went back and scored those essays for emotional content. They found that the nuns who expressed the most positive emotions, things like joy, hope, love, and curiosity, lived, on average, 10 years longer than those who expressed the least. And it’s not just this one study. Other researchers have found the same link: people who experience more positive emotions tend to live longer, even when you factor in things like gender, health status, or social class.

This tells us that positive emotions aren’t just a nice feeling in the moment, they’re building something lasting. They’re influencing our health, our perspective, and even our future.

But what happens when life is hard?

You might think that positive emotions have no place in grief, loss, or personal struggle. But the research shows something different.

People who are able to feel small moments of joy, hope, or curiosity, even in the middle of something painful, tend to do better over time.

They’re more likely to start thinking about their future, setting goals, and making plans. And that kind of forward motion is closely tied to long-term mental health.

One of the ways this happens is by finding positive meaning in small, everyday moments, even in the middle of hard times. And sometimes, that meaning isn’t just found around the hard moment, but within it. Maybe it helps clarify what matters or offers an opportunity for change or connects you more strongly with someone. In other words, it’s finding “the silver lining.”

 That kind of meaning doesn’t erase the pain, but it can help you make sense of it and move forward. And this process again becomes a feedback loop:

• Finding meaning leads to positive emotion
• And positive emotion helps people find even more meaning

Even something as small as a nice conversation or a comforting memory can be enough to shift the direction of your emotional experience.

It’s not about ignoring difficult emotions or pretending you’re happy when you’re not. That’s toxic positivity.

This is about emotional range. It’s about allowing both things to be true.

You can feel the weight of what you’re going through and still notice something that brings you comfort or relief. You can be grieving and still laugh.

These aren’t contradictions. The experiences don’t cancel each other out, they coexist.

They’re examples of resilience.

How Much Positivity Do We Need?

This brings us to one of the most talked-about concepts from the research: the 3-to-1 positivity ratio.

Fredrickson, along with researcher Marcial Losada, studied the balance of positive and negative emotions in different settings, including business teams, couples, and individuals. What they found is that people tend to flourish when they experience at least three positive emotions for every one negative emotion. That’s the tipping point.

In other words, when your daily life includes three times more uplifting or positive moments than stressful or negative ones, your mind and relationships function better. You think more clearly, bounce back faster, and feel more connected and alive.

In psychology, the term flourishing refers to a state of optimal well-being, where you’re not just functioning, but feeling fulfilled, growing, and engaged in life in a meaningful way. And this research shows that people who flourish don’t avoid negative emotions. They just have enough positive ones to carry them through.

A Note About the Math

Now, I do want to mention that some researchers have debated the exact math behind that 3-to-1 ratio. But here’s the thing, the number itself might not be perfect, but the principle is solid:

When positivity outweighs negativity, we do better.

This doesn’t mean we need to count every emotion. But that we understand that positive emotions count. That we start building them into our days the way we do other healthy habits like getting exercise or eating our veggies.

The 3-to-1 ratio gives us a helpful mental benchmark. If most of your moments feel like stress or pressure, having this ratio in your mind lets you notice that something is off. And knowing that positive emotions have so many benefits to your health and overall life you can make prioritizing positivity an active part of your day.

This Is a Skill You Can Build

This is a skill you can build. That’s the message I really want to emphasize today. Upward spirals aren’t only for naturally optimistic or lucky people. They can start with something small, repeated daily.

You don’t need to fake anything or make huge changes.

You just need to begin, with small, real moments that bring something good into your day. You don’t need anything big and dramatic to start the process, even mild emotions like interest, calm, amusement, or gratitude can get the spiral going.

And remember, a positive moment doesn’t have to cancel out the hard stuff to count. They can exist alongside each other. In fact, the more you create space for both, the more you build your emotional flexibility.

And over time, that’s how we move toward flourishing.

This Week’s Happiness Challenge: The Good List

This week, I want you to start paying attention to the smallest moments of positive emotion, especially the ones you’d normally overlook, and start a running list of the good things in your day. Things like:

• A small laugh
• A quiet moment in your car
• The comfort of home

They don’t have to be big, just real. When you notice them, think, “That goes on the good list.” Over time, this practice helps you develop an eye for the good, and that’s how upward spirals begin.

To help keep you on track I’ve created a FREE printable worksheet called The Good List. This worksheet is a continuation of the tools from the other episodes in this series, and together they’ll help you build the habit of prioritizing positivity in your everyday life. They are available now for FREE in the Resources Hub.

Final Thoughts

Upward spirals don’t start with grand gestures. They begin with the smallest moments, and with the choice to see them. Every time you notice something good and let yourself feel it, you’re creating a new emotional pathway. And when you make that a habit, your entire life starts to shift.

Thanks for reading this post from Redefining Happiness. If you found it helpful, I’d love for you to share it with someone who could use a little more light in their day. And don’t forget to grab your Good List worksheet in the Resources Hub to help bring these ideas to life.

See you next week.

-Karen

😚🎶🪕